lolamarya - The Voice

I definitely have neglected this blog for quite a while, but I finally have a good excuse. Saturday, September 4, 2010 at 9:36pm my little girl was born.  After two days of being unsuccessfully induced and at 37 weeks gestational age, because of preeclampsia and high blood pressure, a c-section was done and Zoe Lauren was delivered.  It was the most hellish and grueling experience and every time I look at her I know that it was worth every moment. She was born at 4lbs 10oz and despite being low weight and small for her gestational age, she is and was perfectly healthy.

If you have to become your enemy to defeat him, what have you really won?

My pen and pad said they're sad because I've been neglecting them lately So I'm hoping they've still got love, I mean, I'm hoping they don't hate me And if I'm lucky enough, I can use these words to recreate me And instead of heading down this road to nowhere, I can retrace my steps down that path and become who I was once destined to be

And I'll be able to hold my baby girl. 

Seemingly hopeless so I pray God breathes new life into me I just want things to go back to the way they used to be The return to innocence.... Lost

Tear stained pillows could write my life's songs I only wish it were just as easy to right my life's wrongs.

For not keeping my blogging up to date.  But hey, it is what it is. Life has been what it is and I am slowly but surely trying to make it what I want it with the hand that I have.  One of the most important things I have come to realize it that not everyone is meant to stay in your life.  If other people cause you unnecessary drama, cut them off.  It doesn't matter if it is family, friend, relative, whomever.  You have to start realizing that you are more important than anyone else.... unless you have children.  Then you put them first while still making sure that you keep yourself healthy and happy because that is the only way that you can be a good parent. Okay, end rant.

HAPPY!  That is all. :-)

I had a long conversation with my oldest sister last night.  We had never really gotten deep into the subject of life growing up in the same household.  I realized one thing; I had it easier than all of my other siblings growing up just because of how things fell into place.  My oldest brother and sister are about 10 and 11 years older than me and they dealt with things I never did.  My younger sister is 5 1/2 years younger than me and she had to deal with somethings that I never did as well.  I guess I was the lucky one. I had to deal with things too, but growing up connected to church kind of took me another route.  I also took on responsibility for a lot of things at a young age, so my mentality was different. Fact of the matter is, no one's life has been perfect and we've all been through some things.  We all react to then differently and they have had differing affects on our adult lives.  All in all, life has been one hell of an interestin...